Barefoot Babe in Old Market Square

Ah my to my dear Reader(s)!

I sit here with a huge grin on my face as i am sitting in Jocelyn's house using their wonderful North American Keyboard and relatively quick internet connection - i feel as if i have just entered some secret world where i can be right there with you - ah the internet is a wondrous thing in my eyes.

I have actually an entire blog written up at my place on my laptop - but i was not expecting to come here today (to J to the third's) so i did not save it : ( so i'll do my best to quickly fill you in.

The other day I went to a pavillion market (there are some cobble stone streets and it reminds me of Old Market Square in The Exchange District - Winnipeg) in the middle of the city with 3 women (Sarah, Colleen, Mbola - principal at vision valley) . After Colleen and Mbola had finished the 40 minute adventure of finding and bargaining 20 binders we left the market for some late supper. We were headed to the Korean place which i hear about on a daily basis because of how unbelieveably delicious it is, and to their shock and disappointment it was closed : ( So, we headed towards some other little side street for about 10 minutes, and this little girl - about 4 years old with no shoes came up to me with a huge smile (and of COURSE i smiled back and just wanted to pick her up and swing her around!) and i smiled and she held out her hand and walked right beside me, this barefoot babe, with an open palm saying something in Malagasy that was some sort of plea for money. I couldn't look at her anymore - and i walked into our nice restaurant (some tasty Mexican place) and she remained outside in the dark all alone with no shoes.

I did not give her a penny. I did not give her a even a word in a language she would understand. I gave her an honest smile, which later turned into a 'right now im so confused, right now i wish i wasnt born with so much priviledge, and i wish i didnt feel so guilty' smile.

I sat down in the restaurant, and ate my chicken fahitas and drank my .. i dont know what it's called.. but it's beer mixed with sprite (even though i don't like beer - it was very tasty). I felt very strange, and very horrible. This is the first time in my life that I walked away with money in my pocket - and i walked away without having a conversation - or sharing a meal.

Giving people money has been the topic of MANY conversations between friends and i - and i say do what you can. i have been told - but there are thousands of them - millions even - if we were to give something to that little barefoot babe - they all would come running and you would become like them.

The thing is, sometimes, quite often, i wish that i was 'like them'. Maybe this just sounds really foolish - like i don't know what i'm saying, or i have no idea what it is that would all entail. But it is something that hits my heart tenfold and i can't shake it that i can't do nothing.

I am not going to say how i view this - we should all view it like this - but i think we should be constantly re-examining why we approach situations such as these the way we do. Cause yeah, maybe that little girl would go and give it to some big ass pimp, or maybe she would give it to her mum so she could buy some potatoes and it would only feed them for that one meal and then again tomorrow she would beg, or maybe it would keep her mother from selling her out for the night, or maybe it would i dont know.. maybe it would be better than doing nothing at all.

I write this without having drawn any kind of conclusion about it, i do not want any kind of sympathetic messages please, or 'lisa you cant change the world' messages.. no thank you i will listen, but i simply believe that there is an honest love than has, does, and will continue to change lives, and as one life is changed the entire world is changed - so yes, i do want to be involved in this beautiful adventure of changing the world through love, and if you don't to, thats your business.. but don't tell me it's not possible, because i myself have been changed through the unconditional love of another.

but i would appreciate wisdom.

ah, now how to transition into a myriad of other things, how about i draw a line, and that will suffice -yes?
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-i take baths, cause we don't have a showerhead. i don't particularily enjoy bathing in my own Malagasy filth - but perhaps it will grow on me (hahaha.. literally!)

-georgina (housemate) bakes.. often, she is a wonderful baker and her housemates get to be the recipent of so many delicious things like caramel cupcakes, or some foreign south african tea biscuit

-i have a teacher's meeting tomorrow - monday. and then on tuesday is 'stationary day' when all the kids bring their school supplies and then leave. and then wednesday the KIDS ARRIVE!

-i am very excited to meet the kids and the year started with them. I am excited to get to try and figure out the strengths and weaknesses of all 18 of them.. i have the biggest class in the school : S

-it has only been 1 week and 1 day since my arrival here, and even though it has only been about 5 days since i last saw the Pletts of Madagascar (isn't it so funny.. that i don't have to say which ones?!?!) i found myself really wanting to be with them these couple of days, just to i don't know hear the same accent, or share with them about what i have been encountering, or just having Judah sit on my lap and say funny things. i will definitely appreciate them more and more as the year goes on.

-our toilet in the bathroom doesn't have a toilet seat - it's awkward.

-Since my arrival here last Saturday i have completed reading Picture of Dorian Grey, Started and completed The Great Gatsby, and Started and completed The Shack... now for my next book

-today i met a guy - tommy who is from Chicago.. and he is heading to Mufulira, Zambia in about 1 week.. and he was in Mufulira at the EXACT same time I was there 2 years ago!!! wow - for those of you who understand how incredibly strange and almost impossible this is.. i hope it's blowing your mind like it did for me : )

-i should post some picture eh? unfortunately my camera is at my house, and i only have photos of the horse mural on the bathroom stalls in paris.. and a whole bunch of Judah playing in my suitcase. i know i said i'd try and take photos, but honestly, i know people want picture of the environment, and that would mean me taking pictures of strangers, and just don't feel like it's right at this point in time.. perhaps soon : ) i'll take photos of the school, and my class, and my house and so on for you and put them up here!

Sorry - i am told you need to have an account to leave comments on here - that is unfortunate, i meant to create one where you didn't have to - please e-mail me, or msg me if you have anything to say - thank you : )

invitation_2understanding@hotmail.com

i hope you all have a wonderful week! (it'll be my FIRST week at school - kids arriving, and teachers meetings.. ahhh) i am very excited.